Friday, April 2, 2010

Does this make sense?

Don't you wonder about a state that lets college kids carry concealed weapons but won't let them drink? And why it's perfectly legal for a man to buy violent pornography, but if he's caught taking a whiz on the side of a highway he has to register as a sex offender?

We used to have a great children's book about the 50 states. My favorite chapter was the one with a list of ridiculous laws that have been enacted in one state or another. In Little Rock, Arkansas, it's unlawful to walk one’s cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday. How 'bout the Chicago law that forbids eating in a place that is on fire. Better think twice before offing yourself in South Carolina, where it is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.

One of the most frustrating laws is the one legislating that every single month for as long as one is taking a medication that has been labeled a controlled substance ( if you have Adult ADD, that's probably for the rest of time) one must go to the doctor's office and pick up the piece of paper from them and then take it to the pharmacy. Why does that make sense? Who decides what's a controlled substance? Why aren't Peeps a controlled substance? I worry a lot more about my kids eating Peeps on Easter morning than I do about someone stealing and selling my stimulants, much less me overdosing on them. (Mistakenly took mine and my son's one morning...won't ever do that again)! And what about Viagra? I know a few friends who wouldn't mind seeing some control being exercised on the hand-out of those!

Having been a mostly law-abiding citizen for the better part of my life, I wouldn't mind having the chance to turn the tables on the po-po (i.e. police) just once or twice. Let's see how they like it when I jump out on the curb (dressed in scary jodhpurs and boots), point a gun at their windshield and pull 'em over and give them a big fat speeding ticket. Or act like a pedophile camped out in an unmarked white van at the side of the road while in reality I use a hidden camera to catch the fancy patrol cruiser changing lanes without signaling in a sick twist of the professional credo "To serve and To Protect".

I think I'll start a MidChix flock "Oh For Pete's Sake" where other law-chiding chix can add their favorite legal lu-lus! Hope to see you there!

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